The Shroud of Moron

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The Shroud of Moron
Archeologists in Mount Moron (Har Moron), Israel found a second burial shroud similar to one found in Turin, Italy in the 12th century. That shroud was purported to be a negative image of Jesus of Nazareth, but a local bishop at the time (~1390) said the shroud was a forgery and that a local artist admitted as such. This second shroud, when its image is inverted, shows a face with an uncanny resemblance to U.S. president Donald Trump. The archeologists have dubbed the new find the Shroud of Moron. The Evangelical Christian community believe this new discovery is a third piece of evidence that Donald Trump is actually the Second Coming of Jesus in the form of the Old Testament God. The other two pieces of evidence are the medieval painting of the Old Testament God uncovered in Italy last year, and the recent breakthrough photograph of a black hole. Carbon dating on this newest shroud is as yet inconclusive, but Evangelical researchers at the University of Tel Aviv have been pressuring scientists there to affirm this shroud as authentic.

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Comments

  1. KJMMay 21, 2019 at 11:44 AM

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  2. BelieverMay 21, 2019 at 11:55 AM

    Senator, I was not aware of these new developments--though I suspected them true from a deeper perspective. I have always believed in the second coming despite redicule from my friends and family.

    Now, you have helped me to see a possibility where we can enjoy a future in an eternal Garden of Eden on Earth. I want to help move us towards redemption as quickly as possible. So, today I'm selling my hybrid car and buying a 1963 Ford truck which has a V-8 engine that burns all kinds of oil and also gets no more than 5 mpg. This way I can contribute to the polution of this dying planet and hasten our way towards the 2nd coming of our king and heaven on Earth.

    Thank you for your research and honesty. Our govenment needs more conscientious Senators like you!

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  3. Senator Sky DamonMay 31, 2019 at 11:53 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  4. Senator Sky DamonMay 31, 2019 at 11:56 AM

    I bought an entire fleet of Hummers I leave idling in my palatial estate in the Hamptons.

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